The 2017 Open has been won by Mr T Pye of Freemans Bay, Auckland. In compelling fashion, his unconventional banana shot proved to be too much for his fellow competitors and defied predictions he would spend his time denting the treelined fairways of both Walton and Hobbiton.
Arriving late and going to bed early on Saturday night, although deemed controversial in the extreme was not considered to be significant enough violation of the golfing code to see him docked stabies or generally harassed by the court of public opinion.
Well known cousin of Sean Spicer and sporting a new hairdo that had the Seagull in raptures was local Waihitian Scott Spicer, winner of the 2016 Open. Marc Lesch, another golfer of sober habits and resident of the Hauraki Plains came in 3rd place.
In other news, the winner and new holder of the Dildo Baggins award for being the most shite golfer in the group goes to well know Remuera refugee and advertising mogul Benjamin Pegler, also the only person in the phone book whose first 3 initials spell Peg. In a closely fought tussle with last years holder of the Dildo Baggins award, Adrian Keane, serial golf course shitter, no amount of dropping 15ft putts was enough to save Pegler who to his credit did not shirk the hard yards off the course on both Friday and Saturday night.
Wall of Shame
The Marty award for being Marty goes to ... Marty.
The Gutter Pig award goes to Ben Pegler
The most boring story ever told about making coffee goes to Spid
The Maadi Cup rowing award for attending a Golf tournament by mistake goes to the Seagull
The Henny Penny award for nappy soiling goes to everyone except tournament organiser and all round cool under pressure Adi.
Thanks to:
Marc for all round doing more than his fair share cooking, cleaning and helping out.
NB: The 2018 Open will be held over the end of daylight savings weekend as traditional and will be organised by Spid aka The Seagull.
